Sitting very still... sweating a little.

Words can barely express how much I would like a cigarette right now. I don't NEED ONE OH MY GOD OR I WILL GO OFF THE DEEP END; it's not that kind of feeling. I just know that nothing right now would feel better than a deep warm throatful of hot smoke.

The funniest part? I also know, contradictorily, that it would taste awful, I would retch and spit, and then I would have to brush my teeth and wash my hands like a Lady MacBeth understudy to try and hide the lingering odour. Would you like to know more?

It has some weird correlation with having accomplished what I set out to do with the evening, and now having nothing else to do.

Oh well, off to find something to do! That isn't smoking.

Quiet night

Had a very nice quiet night tonight with The Project Manager. We watched a little TV, a little movie, and just bummed around. It was extra nice because it was so unexpected; I don't know how we managed this in December.... Every other night except Fridays is booked. The PM is doing very well, but concerned about whether her appearance is changing. I think it's 50% happy that it is because it makes it realer, but also 50% sadness because she feels it is a point of no return. I think she worries that she won't get to be youthful after she's a mom, so I work hard to reassure her. I'm really lucky to have her; I realize this more and more every day. She's gentle but uncompromising (I'm pretty sure she is intimidated by NONE of the male members of my family, and has plans for all of them, and doesn't have any plans for the female members because she is confident they can take care of themselves and may need to be counted on as allies in future discussions with the male members...) Huh. As I type that I realize how true it is. Oh my. She's socked out beside me. She falls asleep in no time these days, and we only got 6 hours of sleep last night as she concluded her Burlesque career (so we were up 'til 2 am and up for church at 8 (yeah, burlesque and church, it's how she rolls)) We watched Knocked Up. It might be terrible, I have no idea, as I was too busy realizing how easy it is to be a giant slacker like the male protagonists. A good film for fathers-to-be, as the dialogue between characters is quite true to life, even if the situations are a bit absurd. Ok, that's that for now; I'm off to sleep!

What hath been wrought?

Hey, you know you're still cool when...

Quiet Sunday...

I am sitting on the couch, with Pandora.com bringing me terrible terrible pop music streamed entirely legally (as far as it knows) and drinking a cup of tea. The Project Manager is at a Burlesque practice (as they have a show this week) and the cats are re-enacting Wrestlemania XVII on the kitchen floor. What's new since last I wrote? Well, made two major breakthroughs in heating Isambard. One: discovered that the thermostat isn't accurate, which explains a lot. Two: successfully finished all the ducting, so that heat is enjoyed throughout the house. The pregnancy continues very well, except that the PM is experiencing constant, minor, nausea. No puking, but constant unwellness. The garage is cleaned out, and in fact the car has been parked in there a few times, which is pretty damned amazing. I may go out and try and figure out how to install an automatic garage door opener. The PM resists my attempts to upgrade the garage, but I think she is missing the point about how nice it will be to park indoors during the winter, she never having had to park outside during a prairie winter. Cat the Eldest is completely deaf, we realized, or at least so deaf that she no longer comes when called, and also ignore the vacuum cleaner. I feel very well, and as I make more progress on the non-creative stuff, I feel some creative energy coming back into the grey matter, accompanied by a resurgence of workplace organization and a sense that all is well in my skin.

In which....

...I have too much coffee, and the Project Manager has a cold.

This is actually a recollection of a blog post I wrote last night that
was lost to a non-specific error when I tried to post it.

The PM was asleep beside me, in a fitful fashion, despite the
solicitous attitudes of the Trio Of Idiots, and I was in a
caffeine-induced euphoric state.
I had done some extra work and was reflecting on the peace of mind
that doing the work had created, even though it wasn 't particularly
substantial.

The reflection was basically this: doing a little work before bed,
even a token amount, was more restful than resting.

Booze! Or the lack thereof

As a result of the you-know-what-wink-wink the Project Manager and I have given up drinking.
Prior to this, we were known to have a social drink or five, and it's been a gradually growing source of worry, so this is a good thing on a few levels.

Here's the weird part: we are both really hungry and really thirsty since. The PM's theory is that a couple of pints a day is pretty close to another meal, and it's a pretty serious dose of fluids.

Whodathunk?

A new chapter dawns!

So, gentle reader, we have come to a time where I must ask you to keep a secret. Not for long; only until Christmas.

If you are unable to keep a secret, perhaps due to some piece of WWII shrapnel embedded in your frontal lobes, please stop reading now and click this link. It will amuse you.

Are they gone? Is it just us here now? Excellent. Where was I?

Oh yeah! The Project Manager and I are pregnant. Well, teeeeechnically, she is pregnant. I am just proud.

We are due at the end of June, 2012, so we're still in that period where 50% of first pregnancies end (thus it is not a sure thing by any means).

The blood test is done and the results are on their way, the first doctor's appointment is booked for early November (I'm not invited, btw) and all in all things are good.

The Project Manager is alternately freaked out and ecstatic, often within the same sentence. She has always worried about her abilities as a parent, but I have 100% faith that we will be fine.
She's also worried about how our lifestyle will change, but I maintain it will change less than we think. We entertain at home a lot; you can do that with a baby. We both drink beer; you can do that at home (after the baby is born). We both like the theatre; Babysitters can be had.

The plan after the baby's arrival is that The PM will take off a small few months (number TBD) and then I will take parental leave for an appropriate period to cover until formal childcare arrangements can be made. These arrangements will likely include some cobination of Aunts and Uncles, Grandmas, and compressed work weeks.

So how are you?