Mr. Grumpypants

I get SO grumpy sometimes, for no good damn reason.

I feel, at the time when it happens, completely overwhelmed. And it's labour, like physical labour, to get a deep breath and to push on through it.

The Project Manager is good at commenting on it when it happens, but it's hard to get through.

There's no a lot of warning when it happens, but I guess I could keep my 'eyes' peeled for the warning signs.

It's really important that I get this managed properly. It's not going to get better on its own, quite the opposite

Tough moments

I had a good moment of existential dread this week, where I realized that I may be the best at everything I do right now, and that from now on I may just get worse and worse at everything I know how to do.

Then it passed and I went to work.

Thus is middle age.

Desire to be introspective....

Sigh.... I wish I was one of those people who could lay their feelings and motivations out, who could really sort themselves out like some kind magic eye puzzle: "If I step back and tilt my head just so, and then boogle my eyes just so, I suddenly understand everything".

But I"m not that guy,

I'm basically a goofball. I thunder my way through life with a myriad of half-completed ideas, completely aware that I never finish anything, but generally having a wonderful time.

I see people who get things done, and I marvel at their abilities, and then I go back to having a hoot.

I am GOOD at having a hoot.

I worry that it makes me groundless, or wayless, that I never commit to anything, really, but just bash on things randomly.  It's basically how I play Streetfighter, too, for the record.

Also My attiention span is about this long.

Had a deep thought, but forgot what it is...

Dang it was good, too...

What is going on these days?  Not much!

I'm restarted taking Circus Classes, which is fun, and embarrassingly difficult.  I"m still pretty strong, but I am NOT bendy.  The instructor is really good, and the other students are awesome, and it's turning into a really supportive group of people with good senses of humour

We're trying to get our social circle back up and running after the busy-ness of the last few months, and that's really intense and tiring because we're still so busy....

:$

I also have a couple of friends I've stopped seeing entirely, which is too bad.

Actually, I feel like I have a bunch of friends who are still doing all the old fun stuff I used to do, that I don't have time to do anymore.  And to be honest, I do occasionally miss the related misbehaviour.

Just a general update

Nothing particularly exciting this week,

Girls are good an being cute, and we've just started removing the outside of the house to reinsulate and reside it, which will be super exciting!

I"m hoping it solves my weird kitchen floor draft problem.

And this is last big house renewal piece

I love my house.

But it has all my money.

Vimy

"VIMY FORGED THE NATION OF CANADA!!!"

Uh, no...

1) Canada is not forged. It's not a metal rigid thingy, it's a big messy nation of issues and problems and dreams and solutions and snow and cold and darkness and light

2) Vimy was the unnecessary deaths of thousands of young men, recruited into some bullshit propagandaic post-colonial conflict because the ruling houses of Europe couldn't get their shit in order, and our nation deserves better than that

3) Vimy was characterized by brutal hand to hand, machine gun to bayonet, and club to weapon. If the ability to do that is what characterizes a nation-building event, then I have no interest in being part of a nation.

Of course, saying that would be totally inappropriate at this time

First day of Spring!!!

So what's going on around here these days?

The Project Manager is at the theatre basically every day for the next two weeks, so I have to single parent my way through that (not a big deal, really)

Work is quietly busy, at exactly the right level of busy-ness

Everyone in our house has a cold, that's not so fun, frankly.

This week, in theory, the work will start on The Estate to re-side the house and replace the back
decks.

This will be a fun project, and probabky an ENORMOUS mess.

I confess that this winter has not been productive one for me, in the house, although some small progress has been made on basement stairs, and basement stowage in general.