From this time last year:

"So one of the behaviours I am attempting to extinct in myself is losing my temper. I mean, sometimes you gotta yell at your kids, right, sure, but I always want to make sure that  I am in control of when I do that, and sometimes I'm not. So I'm off to fix that.

But.. as I work to decrease the number of times I have a dad-tantrum, I find that I am, generally, grumpier. My peaks of anger have decreased, but my baseline is higher.  I mean, it could also be that I'm _exhausted_, which is a reasonable other variable that explain this.  But work shall continue."

I am now in much better shape, generally speaking. My temper is better, and my baseline is lower.

The key mantra is "I do not have to lower myself to the level of people who are angry with me (children, I'm looking at you...)" so I am getting better at managing my response to things.

A fall reflection

Well, here we are... another week gone by.

My self-regulation / self-care routine has been doing better, although my energy is still not where it should be, it's better.

We're having a bit of a house argument, but that's ok, it's nothing serious. And with a holiday coming up then it's a bit of a break for everyone, and maybe enough of us will have the day off that we can get a lot done!

I may actually need to re-roof my garage tomorrow with a private day off that I have

I mean, it just needs enough to get it through the winter.

Time away in the mountains

We went running!

We went walking!

We had a brief memorial for a friend's dad who died and there was no money in the family for a funeral.

It was very nice, and was a nice break. I actually felt like I was away from work, which was nice.

Self-care again

Yah, ok, it's a theme, whatever.

Anyway, THIS week has been much better for self-care and routine and getting done what needs what get done.

I have had a good break from my phone from time to time, and that's maybe a help, but honestly I couldn't tell you what has changed this week from the last one.

Weather?  Not having a laptop at home? Being more caught-up at work and therefore less stressed at home?

Not sure...

More self-care trouble

I mean, it's not a crisis, but man, it's hard to keep on top of this one, when the other parts of life start to struggle.

But I have the afternoon off, so I hope to get back on the housework routine, and that I hope will re-centre me in my happy routine.

Check back in 24 hours!

*** 24 hours later: It went ok! Kept everything mostly under control and took care of me too

Parental questions

I suppose every parent wonders: Am I raising a Psychopath?

Peanut #1 has been kicking our asses after school, especially around dinner time, all week.  I mean, it's probably restraint failure, it's probably us trying to... wait, why the hell are we trying to feed her at this time? I think it's making her crazy with rushed pressure.

Maybe we need to focus on the pause and recharge steps of the day...

Anyway, of course she's not a psycho, but she is a very strong-willed hard-working child whose brain is just done by that time of day.

Just. Done.

So busy....

Work is in an interesting place right now: for some reason we seem to be insanely busy and it's Not. Getting. Better.

There is starting to exceed even my not-for-profit-association honed time management skills.

And I may be freaking out.